Lower Expectation

It is already a year since I decide to lower my expectation to others. Whoever it is, as good as it seems, I prefer not to keep any expectations on them. Sometimes, I prefer to be skeptical and let others “decide” themselves how far I can trust their words and deeds. A good friend ever told me, “Not everyone is your cup of tea.” When someone else promises, you’ll just forget about it and never hope they will remember to keep it.

Earlier this year, I was worried about myself. Why am I so negative? Until then recently, I found this quote,

“When one’s expectations are reduced to zero, one really appreciates everything one does – Stephen Hawking.”

In the past, whenever someone else let me down, my reaction was, “How come? What’s wrong with me? “But now, my reaction is very much different. I just sighed and said to myself, “Oh well, sooner or later, of course they will do. And it’s not my fault, it’s them. ”

That is why, I’m no longer hurt when someone that I think he/she is a good friend, they  turn out good to me when they want or need something. I’m no longer surprised when people that I think they are on my side, suddenly they comes to “attacked” me. I began to realize that I had actually made the right choice. I also began to see the change in my mindset from different perspectives. I’m not negative, I just choose to be more realistic.

And did you know? My life becomes happier ever since the day I decided to reduce my expectations to other people. My life feels calmer and  I have more energy to think about my goal and my own happiness.

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Geology Trip

View on Path

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Real angel doesn’t always look like an angel

Many years ago, I had a colleague and also a good friend who was well known for her kindness. She was very generous, friendly, compassionate, and cheerful. It was all the reasons why I was so comfort to be close to her.

And then someday, we had a big problem at work. She did a terrible mistake that could jeopardize her career. I had no heart to let her down, not after all the hard works she had put into. Not to mention that my team’s mistake was my mistake too. So there I took the bullet. I was very sure that I would be able to handle it way better than her. She would be devastated if she had to pay for her mistakes herself, she wouldn’t be able to cope with it.

I was right that I would be just fine. It was hurtful to me too, but I was fine. But then just a little while after that, somebody came to my desk and brought up that old issue to me and my colleague I protected. As usual, my colleague became pale everytime somebody questioned that one problem she created. I could see a strong fear on her face. So there I fought for her, again, until that other person gave up and walked away.

After that other person left the room, this girl I was fighting for surprisingly told me this, “If I were him (that other person who just left the room), I would also do the same.” She said it as if it was my fault to stand up for her! What was even worse, she started to try so hard to make friends with the people who attacked me for her mistakes. Maybe, she was just trying to be nice like she always did, but really? Didn’t she realize what she did only made me look like I was the bad guy?

As she left me to take care of the mess she made all by myself, I finally realized this girl might be kind, but she was not loyal to anyone. She always wanted to play safe, she would never take anyone’s side no matter how much she owed them, and now if I think about it again, her kindness was actually a shield to protect her interest. She tried so hard to be likeable so that she would always be protected.

Learning from my past experience with this one former friend, I started to be able to recognize similar traits on the people around me.

In the beginning, they look like a pure angel. They are kind, always help others, always see the very best of everyone, and they barely speak anything ugly about anyone else. They always try to look for the bright side of everything and sometimes, it can make us feel like they take side of the strangers rather than our side. With that being said, their kindness will make us choose to ignore that feeling thinking that maybe, they only try to help us to see everything positively.

They look perfect, until this life starts to get rough and they start to reveal their true colors.

This kind of person will never fight back. Never ever hope they will try to protect you because they won’t ever risk themselves for someone else. Instead, they will hide behind someone else’s back looking for protection. And then they will just stay quiet and watch the battle from their safe place until it ends.

They are kind, but not kind enough to stand up for us. Not helpful enough to support us when we need it most. It’s all merely because they refuse to fight their very own fear. They know they can help, but they prefer to stand still or even to run away. And they do not hesitate to make friends with enemies just to protect themselves. They do not hesitate to leave us bleed alone in the battlefield either.

It takes times to learn someone else’s true color. I might sound cynical, but it’s now hard for me to trust someone who seems too kind to be true. Someone who is averagely kind is often better than someone who seems overly kind. I’d rather be careful with the people who try too hard to please me in our first met. Maybe, they only need to use me as their shield. A shield they will leave behind anytime I’m no longer favorable to them.

Being kind is not about giving out some delicious snacks for everyone, telling good jokes to make people laugh, nor about asking how someone else’s weekend was going; it’s about doing the right things even when it’s no longer easy to do it right. And a good person will definitely take sides and give a full support anytime it’s necessary. A real good person doesn’t run and hide to play safe, let alone betraying the one who takes the hit for them.

I’ve come to learn that a real angel doesn’t always look like an angel. They might not always put a pretty smile on their faces, they don’t always try to please everyone they meet, and they don’t always do the sweet talk and baby nearly everyone they know. As always being said, don’t judge a book by its cover, you’ll never know how your judgment could do you wrong.

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Travelling with My Mom

A good traveller is one who knows how to travel with mom. Why? because we are all travelers in the wilderness of this world, and the best we can find in our travels is an honest friend. I might be get more drama when I am travel with my mom but, I see travelling as a great learning process. When traveling with my mom, I take large doses of patience and tolerance. Making a travel plan is crucial when travelling with my mom. That is why I should always respect her and take into account her health, mood and feelings when making travel plans.

For me and my mom, travelling has always been an integral part of our identities. We are a team that loves to expand our horizon and mindset. Although my mom is older, she prides herself in having twice the energy of anyone, regardless of their age. My mom turned out to be even more adventurous than I thought. She never complained about being tired. Our travel style is very indicative of both our mother-daughter relationship and also our approach to living a happy and intentional life.

From my personal experience I know how important it is to keep the balance between sightseeing, eating, talking and taking pictures. Try not to spend too much time walking or eating. That can either make my mom bored or way too exhausted. I teach her how to take pictures, how to haggle, look for affordable accommodation or talk to locals. Once she knows that, she will be a great help, and making our bond stronger than ever.

Travelling is all about experiencing new things and having fun. No matter what mood I am in when travelling with my mom, I try to stay optimistic! Make my mom laugh, crack some jokes with her, talk about things we both liked and disliked on our trip and make sure my mom is always happy. Traveling makes everyday issues seem so much smaller and really changes my perspective to my mom….

Happy mother’s day….
December 22, 2017

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Redeem Voucher Perawatan dan Krim Natasha Clinic

Di event Meet and Greet Beauty Blogger road to #IamNatasha lalu (baca disini), saya mendapat voucher perawatan dan cream dari Natasha Clinic senilai Rp 250.000. Hari itu rencananya saya mau coba redeem voucher dengan paket perawatan Facialnya, karena terakhir kali saya facial di Natasha itu tahun 2014 dan hasilnya lumayan memuaskan (baca disini). Selain itu, mumpung si “Dia” juga lagi off kerja 2 minggu dan bisa nganterin makanya saya memutuskan untuk facial hari itu. 😊

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Tapi sayangnya setelah konsul dengan dokternya, saya gak jadi facial karena kulit saya lagi sensitif parah (kering ngelupas gitu) jadi gak disaranin untuk facial dulu sama dokternya. Sebenarnya bisa saja saya datang lagi di hari lain dimana kondisi wajah saya sudah membaik dan siap untuk facial, namun karena masa berlaku vouchernya hanya sampai 11 Januari 2018 dan schedule sampai saya tanggal segitu juga bakalan padat, jadi vouchernya saya redeem untuk menebus produk krim yang diresepkan dokternya.

Berhubung kondisi kulit saya yang lagi kering mengelupas, makanya saya nurut aja waktu Dokternya meresepkan rangkaian produk perawatan untuk masalah kulit sensitif. Produknya terdiri dari Facial wash, Face toner, Krim anti iritasi, Krim pagi dan Krim malam dengan total harga Rp 325.000. Dengan menggunakan voucher Rp 250.000, maka saya hanya perlu membayar kekurangannya Rp 75.000 dan mendapatkan bonus sebuah pouch cantik berwarna merah dari Natasha Clinic.


Rangkaian produk untuk kulit sensitif + Pouch cantik

Oh iya, sekedar tips nih karena Natasha emang suka komersil jadi dokternya tuh kadang ngasih resep produk yang sebenernya gak kita butuhkan kayak Rejuvenation cream, CC cream dll. Makanya saat Dokternya sedang meresepkan produk, banyak produk yang saya tolak, saya bilang bahwa saya cuma butuh produk untuk perawatan dasar aja, gak butuh produk lainnya. Soalnya nih, kalau kita gak menolak, tagihan kita juga bakalan ikut membengkak hehe. Untuk review produknya menyusul di post selanjutnya ya, doakan mudah-mudahan produknya cocok di kulit sensitif saya. 😉



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Meet & Greet Natasha Beauty Blogger road to #IamNatasha

Dalam rangka menyambut ulang tahun Natasha Skin Clinic Center yang ke-23 pada tanggal 26 Desember nanti, saya diundang ke acara Meet And Greet Beauty Blogger Road To #iamnatasha di Kalpa Tree. Meskipun hari itu Bandung diwarnai hujan deras, namun tidak mematahkan semangat para beauty blogger untuk hadir dengan menggunakan dresscode fabulous white.


Dalam roadshow ini, Dr. Ina dan Stephanie Juliancy memberikan beauty tips untuk para wanita zaman now serta penyelenggaraan kontes Face Of Natasha, di mana para konsumen Natasha bisa mengikuti dengan cara nge-upload foto bare face ke Instagram. Program I Am Natasha ini bertujuan untuk encourage orang walaupun dengan make up yang minim tapi tetap harus pede, dan merawat kulit wajah itu penting banget daripada hanya sekedar makeup untuk menutupi kekurangan yang ada di wajah.


Pada sesi berikutnya, Natasha memperkenalkan produk pembersih wajah terbarunya yaitu Natasha Cleanser Oxygen (02) Bubble yang menurut klaimnya dapat mengangkat sisa-sisa makeup dan kotoran debu diwajah hanya dalam hitungan detik.  Kandungan moringa pterygosperma dan micro bubblenya efektif ngebersihin kotoran sampe ke pori-pori kulit. Cukup apply ke wajah tunggu sekitar 20 detik dan lap pake tisu, maka seluruh makeup akan terangkat dan tidak meninggalkan bekas licin.


Selain itu, diperkenalkan juga produk Argan Herbal Series yang terdiri dari shampoo, conditioner, bath shower dan body lotion. Hadir dalam bentuk travel size, rangkaian produk ini terbuat dari bahan alami argan oil yang berfungsi untuk melembabkan serta memberikan nutrisi kepada kulit dan rambut.


Sayangnya sesi perkenalan produk merupakan sesi terakhir dalam acara roadshow ini, namun sebelum pulang, kami masih diberikan goodybag yang berisi paket produk Argan Herbal Series serta voucher perawatan dan cream senilai Rp 250.000 dari Natasha Skin Clinic Center.

Next, Natasha juga mengadakan Meet & Greet Beauty Blogger #MGNatasha road to #IAmNatasha di kota besar lainnya di Indonesia. So, setelah hari ini di Bandung, Siap-siap untuk kota selanjutnya. 🙂

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Keep Moving and Keep Shining

When one door closes, another opens – Alexander Graham Bell

Sudah semingguan ini saya cukup sibuk dengan beberapa UAS, project dan deadline sampai-sampai nggak sempat menulis di blog, padahal ada beberapa hal yang sudah terpikirkan untuk di-post. Setiap kesempatan untuk menjadi produktif sungguh saya syukuri. Rasa syukur ini kemudian membawa saya untuk meluangkan waktu dini hari untuk menulis blog post singkat ini.

Waktu resign dari kerjaan saya sekitar 6 bulan lalu, saya sempat berpikir bahwa menjadi mahasiswa (lagi) adalah sebuah pengorbanan jika dilihat dari sisi karir, finansial dan sosial. Dari sisi karir dan finansial, tentu saya harus berhenti membangun jaringan dalam lingkup profesi saya serta harus siap menerima segala konsekuensi finansial pasca resign. Dari sisi sosial, saya juga harus siap menerima pandangan konservatif dari lingkungan sekitar yang bilang perempuan gak perlu sekolah tinggi. Cuma yang saya pikirkan saat itu: Kalau saya berani memilih, tentu saya juga sudah memikirkan konsekuensinya.

I closed the door and I had to move on

Namun ternyata setelah saya menjalaninya, dengan menjadi mahasiswa (lagi) membawa begitu banyak kesempatan baru bagi saya dan membuat saya kenal banyak orang baru yang nggak saya bayangkan sebelumnya. Kesempatan-kesempatan ini, kalau saya pikir-pikir lagi, justru nggak akan saya terima kalau saya masih bekerja di tempat yang lama.

Sejak menjadi mahasiswa (lagi), ternyata banyak sekali ide, inspirasi, dan kesempatan untuk mewujudkan banyak hal, termasuk mimpi-mimpi saya. Setelah saya menutup satu pintu di belakang saya dan melihat ke depan, ternyata ada banyak pintu-pintu lain menunggu. Memang tidak semua pintu itu terbuka dan bahkan banyak yang sulit dibuka. Namun, saya yakin bahwa selama kita keep moving and keep shining, akan ada banyak pintu yang terbuka dan kemudian membawa kita ke pintu-pintu berikutnya.

Namun di atas segalanya, menjadi mahasiswa (lagi) membuat saya belajar hal-hal penting dalam hidup: tentang pertemanan, integritas, networking, serta tentang mencintai dan dicintai. 🙂


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